The Mystic-Looking Artifact of a Non-Denominational Trickster God
July 10, 2018
Here's how it goes down:
First, a non-denominational trickster god casts a spell over some artifact he found in his now ex-girlfriend's closet as he was packing up his stuff to move into an apartment with a landlord simple-minded enough to fool into lowering his rent using his trickster god powers.
For this particular spell, the artifact can be anything so long as it is mystic-looking enough to seem extraordinarily valuable to anyone inclined to buy it. In this case, the trickster god uses a bronze-colored coin impressed with the likeness of a naked creature bearing the upper half of a woman, the lower half of a man, the head of a wild boar, and the wings of what most people would assume is an angel or an eagle, but are really a crow's.
All that's left now is to give it away.
The non-denominational trickster god could give it to his ex-girlfriend, but she is also a deity so the intended effects might be rendered impotent. Besides, she knows him well enough to be suspicious. She'd definitely think something was up. And, of course, she would be right.
So the trickster god gives the coin to his simple-minded landlord, who happens to be a collector of rare and valuable trinkets. In exchange, the landlord offers money, but the trickster god cannot accept money because the spell requires that the first transfer be a gift. The least I can do, says the landlord, is two months free rent. This, the trickster god can accept, as there is no tangible benefit and therefore cannot be considered a sale. So they shake on it and just like that the landlord is the first person in a chain of people to fall under the spell of the boar-man-woman-angel-eagle-crow coin, but he most certainly isn't the last.
Wanna know the rest?
Here's how it goes down:
Thing about that coin is, once you have it you need to sell it in the next twenty-four hours. Otherwise, you'll drop dead on the spot like fly who stayed on the wall to long.
Naturally, you don't get to know about this until you yourself have bought the coin. The spell jumps from mind to mind to mind so only the person who is under it knows what to do with it. And the thing about it is, you need to sell it for more than you bought it.
Take the landlord for example. He got it for free. So he needs to sell it for at least one cent. And that's what he does. He sells it for one cent to another tenant, who sells it for two cents to his sister who sells it for three to a stranger who sells it for four.
And so on.
Eventually it made its way to me. Like the non-denominational trickster god's simple-minded landlord, I happen to be a collector of rare and valuable objects. Unlike the non-denominational trickster god's simple-minded landlord, I do not happen to have purchased the boar-man-woman-angel-eagle-crow coin for the bargain price of two months' free rent. Instead, I bought it at auction.